25th Dec 2011 Christmas Day
Felt especially lonely for this Christmas.
Was it because of this loneliness that I started remembering you? Was that what you wanted me to do, as in to talk to you more often?
I know you care how I feel and I am indeed much comforted when I thought of writting to you.
What went wrong exactly? I am Lost! I am Saddened! Where are my friends, relatives ?? I am tired of contacting them to pull them together for a party celebration. No sms... No christmas greeting...
I felt living alone. My companions are my kids. I pity them for having such a mom. I am nobody.
I am living in guilt. I felt terrible. Was it the change of environment in my new home that affected me so much? 4 walls, no scenery outside the window, noise pollution, air pollution, no nice trail for me to walk my dog? I have been telling myself to conquere all these thoughts which are negative and unhealthy. Dear Father, please save me.
It is time to rest. Ok, I pray for a better day tomorrow. Be happy. Lastly, I thank you Cecilia & her family for invitating us to her place for xmas dinner tonight. It is great to be there and the food was yummy.
Also, I pray for my little girl who is down with a high fever (40 degree) early this morning. Hope she recover well :)
God. I need your blessing in my life.